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The Dark Aging

Month Eleven.

I couldn’t even make it a full year.

On June 25 I had to inform my current Landlord that I cannot afford Rent *(in whole) this Month.

I asked if I could arrange two payments this Month.

He agreed since during my eleven months here, I have never been late on paying Rent nor had to ask for an extension.

I am supposed to get paid in 2 days from my New Job, and I have a lot of crunching to do. *(No Over-Time and $150.00 in Gas already is two against me).

So, Month Eleven. On the dot.

I spent last evening alone (As usual), but was actually invited to an Event. But, it was an Hour away and my budget cannot afford it and my Finances are weak.

So, again, Saturday evening was spent partially on my Enclosed Porch with my two Cats and Outdoor Candles *(My beautiful two sets of LED Lights are fractured. My Wild Child broke one by climbing up the Enclosed Porch to pursue the cord then as he jumped downward he caught the cord and it withered off. The other set? Just stopped working. So, I purchased two[On-Sale] LED Citronella Candles. The LED part of the Candles worked twice. Last night just flames. **The other Candle is a cheap Outdoor Candle that has a wire handle. I though about mounting it on the porch, but Wild Child would probably destroy that too).

We spent about 2 hours on the Enclosed Porch.

The Weather had calmed and a breeze came through to offset the 90° all day temperature.

My Cats seemed restless, almost bored last night.

I was surprised, shocked a little. But, maybe they know, feel something is going on. This is not our home anymore.

Yes, I am trying to re-locate closer to my new Job.

I have already looked at 1 Apartment, and tomorrow, I go look at a House I’ve been trying to see all this past week.

The House has an Enclosed Porch, but with Windows. 🙂 *(Something I’ve dreamt about for most of my life).

I am hoping this will work.

I will be receiving some Financial Help from my Parents since

One, My “Sister” decided not to help me then disappeared from my life.

Two, Can’t move home/My Parents House. It’s been made clear as a diamond that I am not worth as much as others.

If it doesn’t work out, I have a week or so to search and find a place.

If not, I’m stuck here in worse Financial shape in my entire Adult life.

That means there’s only one solution if that occurs.

So, Today.

Sunday. Now, dedicated solely to prepare my body for Driving.

I like my new Job.

I really do.

I like who I work for and work with.

If I can make it to a place closer, things would be easier on my Health and Finances 100%.

It would be the turn of luck I need after all of this darkness and tragedy these past eight months.

I am truthfully hopeful regarding tomorrow and the week.

I’m not praying*(The Buddhist way), asking out loud for help(light), but in true hope with 100% of my being in posititivity.

Walking in with open eyes and a clear heart

That my future could turn.

Release me. I need the road to transformation not just for my physical self, but emotionally, financially, and for my two Fursons who need me.


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