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Marriage Defunct

Saturday.

Lá Fhéile Pádraig Shona!

My Favorite Western Holiday, And I’m Stuck In Bed With An:

1. Acute Sinus Infection

2. Ear Infection

3. Chills/Fatigue

*(Ontop of my other Health Issues and Disability).

I started the rigorous course of intense Antibiotics today *(I could only afford the Oral. I need the EarDrops, but it is $66.00 WITH Insurance**(That I haven’t been able to afford).

But, this morning wasn’t about botched plans last night *(I was supposed to go on a Date with someone I have been talking to for about 2 weeks. It would have been our first date. He got mad. Whatever it was, it’s over).

Or the fact I am so sick, have to Teach, and miss another Holiday

But, the fact I am angry about something I came across last night.

My Ex-Husband.

His Girlfriend posted something public about her children and someone made a comment referring to my Ex-Husband.

It brought back all of the pain, anger, hurt on how he treated me and how it ended.

I’m currently finishing tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom.

A Book I purchased years ago, started it years ago, and it got lost within other books, work, then Disability.

The part of the book that is really reaching to me pulling me inside is how “Morrie” describes “Detachment.”

The concept of the philosophy of being Detached is apart of my own Religion (Buddhist), but I have never been great and the art of detachment [in a healthy formula].

So, when I was finishing my first set of my morning routine (in such sickness) I thought about the Book and Detachment.

What my Ex-Husband did to me and how he treated me, the memories are forever there, but how do I detach from it now *(i.e seeing the Post and becoming angry and letting it infiltrate my current being.

I typed him a Letter a few months back. But, never sent it. It was more therapeutic at the time when I chose my words.

But, now, I want to re-enter the Letter and send it.

Detaching myself, permantley in writing my emotions and my soul.

He deserves to know what he did was awful and how he was as a Husband.

It reminds me of a title of a Pink Floyd album “A Momentary Lapse of Reason.” (1987).

Is that what the Letter represents or will become?

I can type a 1,000 pages and all he has to do is discard them in the trash.

*(My plan was/is to mail the Letter).

In addition, I have not received any photos of our Dog in over seven months. *(Just the single photo of when he my Ex-Husband picked him up).

How do I detach from that?


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