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Debt Harvest

Month 6.

I couldn’t make Rent. Literally.

One Individual owes me $1,100 (since September 2017) and will never pay me back.

One Individual promised me for two months that “everything will be ok. I got you.” There was assistance, but promises fractured.

My Mother. I did not ask for help. I know she can’t. To my surprise, she sent my a Personal Check that covered the rest of what needed to be paid.

I was ecstatic, shocked, in tears.

I went to Upload the Check, and the Financial Firm said they Closed My Account.

Another set-back.

So, on Thursday at 3:00a.m, I spent hours mapping out how to Cash the Personal Check, then shift said Cash to my Bank Account.

At 11:31a.m Thursday, February 1, 2018, my Rent was paid.

Not a dime from my own.

Now, I owe and with what has been occurring with Income the last two months is impossible.

I still owe on 2 Utilities and my Mobile Phone.


Fuck You.

I could be a Third-Shift CNC Operator, with my Dog (I haven’t received a photograph in almost 9 months), my two Cats, and living with Freedom.

Instead, I Teach 1 Class Today, I have to return to the Pharmacy (I spent 1.5 hours and $205.00 yesterday)

And catch up at my other VERY PT Career, Writing Instructor. (24 Papers in less than two weeks [which is insane but super efficient]=$274.00)

*My Content Writing Job ended January 30, 2018. The Project is Complete and the Head Boss quit.

I’m lying here, glacial from the inside out. Wearing 4 shirts (one, my go-to Hoodie), Compression Stockngs AND socks. I paid $88.00 for my Gas Bill from December, I still owe $129.55 from January.

My Gas Bill has NEVER been that high during the Winter. But, I live in a house that was built circa 1900, and my Space is above the Basement. *I tried keeping the heat off, but it was so cold in January, I actually got sick from no heat.

I’m tired.

This stress of no Income has depleted all happiness from my Soul. I don’t talk to anyone/go anywhere, do anything.

Alone, I break.

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