As I finish yet another stressful service of emails and meetings, and watch my Hours dwindled once more, I think about a television series.
I am in the (very slow) process of re-viewing (again) the Series. I’m paused on S1 EP8.
I connect with this show minus the reality of my current age when the Series was actually on the air (I do remember my Parents watching it live).
To be “Thirtysomething,” Divorced, No Children, and in my seasons, Disabled is a haunting reflection of what the Series’ concept was back when Yuppies and Reaganomics filled the airwaves.
I think I relate most to ‘Gary’ the unmarried English Professor who is anti-Establishment.
He lives in a gloomy apartment (which I think is fabulous), still holds onto the Past, meaning his Radical/Left Ideology, doesn’t want Children, and prefers to play racquet ball then attend birthday parties.
When he does not receive Tenure, his persona is altered. This is me, when I became Disabled on 3/30/15.
He quits. What’s the fucking point of working yourself to the bone (literally) and to be passed over because he’s Creative, a Non-Conformist?
I felt the same. I was an Adjunct ESL and English Instructor, having to Educate at two Colleges to earn enough just to survive. *I do not hold a PhD, so Tenure is out.
I left my last Ajunct Position because I could not take what Education has become: Common Core Curriculum.
As an College Instructor trying to teach English Composition 101, is now impossible. My Students read only ONE Book their entire Highschool Career!!!
I moved on. Teaching Preschool. Of course, I get a Staphylococcus Infection (in my Sinus) and for five months, Unemployed, on my Staph Deathbed.
After Malaria Drugs cured me, I am back in the game as Gary was.
But, I remained in the Education Field ad he became apart of Urban Planning and Development.
I became an Applied Mathematics Instructor emphasis in CNC (Computer Numerical Control).
I don’t know, but I woke up one day, excellent in Mathematics (let’s clarify, Applied Mathematics).
I taught Applied Mathematics/Adult Education (once again). Students that wanted to be Welders or CNC Operators have to take the TABE Exam (by law). The Mathematical Requirements are Ninth and Eleventh Grade Entry Math Levels.
My Students were at a 5th-7th Grade Math Level. *This was called the Bridge Program. Started by my former Boss and Myself.
Gary was put in-charge of the severe Homeless epidemic problem in Philadelphia (where the Series takes place). He meets a Woman and she exposes him to her daily struggles in an economy built for the rich.
He becomes overwhelmed with what little support is given to the Organization he works for. He begins to view the World and himself differently.
I am angry at the American Education System and how it turned so many students into ghosts. How the fuck are my Adult Ed. Students (all former Vets. some serving in Vietnam) at a 5th Grade Math Level? *Serve your Country, but never become more than a Custodian.
My Passion for this new Bridge Program was my Mission. I hit the ground running hard. Educating my Adult Ed. Students Long Division by hand, Fractions, and never giving up on them.
Until March 30, 2015, when I Collapsed and was rushed to the Emergency Room.
I could never Educate outside my home again.
As Gary, he ends up having a Child (Emma), getting married (to the Woman whom he met at the Organization) and he dies in S4.
He is the only Character that is killed off.
Think about it.
The Left Wing English Professor rejected from Tenure Works To Try And Solve The Homeless Problem While Never Assimilating To The Capital Idea (Yes he does have a baby, Out of Wedlock), And Continues His Passion For A Better World, And He Is Hit By Car While He Rides His Bicycle Home, Killed Instantly.
The Left Wing College Instructor Teaching At Two Colleges To Survive, Quits, Returns To Educate Children, Infected with Staphylococcus Almost Perishing, Again Returns To Academia Trying to Save People From What Is Called Working Class While Never Assimilating To ANY Fucking Capital Chains (I can’t have children, but at 34 no one bothered me much anymore about being Motherless), And Continues My Passion For A Better World, And On March 30, 2015, Disabled Instantly.
It’s us Renegades that pay the price for having a conscious, understanding that our Work as Educators is forever.
Not settling for a Mortgage, two cars, dinner parties, emptiness.
But, when is it our time? Killed off before we even begin.
Now, Thirtysomething, vanishing before my eyes and who I once was.