A dreary, unemployed, silent, Tuesday afternoon has me thinking about the scene in The Breakfast Club when Bender pulls his switchblade out to “scare” Clark.
That one moment that passes as they look into each others eyes, just for a second, high school life became real.
I was sitting on a splintered elementary school swings, waiting for a girl who lived across the street from the playground.
She came over without questions, but hesitation.
I informed her that I was done playing games with her friend, and that things were becoming serious.
I pulled my knife out, opening the blade without touching its edge, and stuck it into the aged wood.
She yelled out my name, and I could see she knew behind it all, I was not wearing my rebel facade.
I was genuinely ready for war.
*I was 15 that day on the local school playground.
I had not seen The Breakfast Club until I was in my Twenties).
A year later, my personal Revolt evolved into a Sexual Revolution.
I am by no means a Nymphomaniac or ‘Sex Goddess’, but the debate, ideas, and Philosophies of and on Sex were a consistency in my circle.
We were unlocking the previous Sex Revolution.
In my circle, we were independent girls.
Dating who we wanted with no social pressure.
Most of us were a ‘secret something.’
There were summer private fornication parties, hooking up in the Science Labs while in school, explicit notes, and car sex.
(MANY of our rendezvous were same sex experiences).
We owned our sexuality.
But, when we did walk through those high school doors, we kept our power underground.
We were still aware of the misogynistic
push we were under.
We would be torn apart.
So, like the knife in the wood, change within teenage affliction manufactured us unless we tampered with the design and became a positive example of our disordered revolution.